Negative Self-Talk is based on preconceived ideas that we’re not good enough’ or cannot do or say things right. According to different researchers, negative Self-Talk is any inner dialogue that’s we have with ourselves that may restrict our ability to believe in ourselves and our own abilities, to reach our potential.”
How to address negative Self-Talk?
The first step is to identify the problem. Once we recognize our tendency to speak negatively to ourselves, we can better adjust to what is happening. When we are in tune with negative self-talk, we do our best to stop it by reshaping our self-talk and asking ourselves questions to challenge it.
Constructive Self-Talk:
You can think of negative self-talk as your inner critic. If you’ve been mean to yourself in the past or your self-talk is consistently negative, it may take time to unlearn negative self-talk and replace self-talk with positive (or constructive) self-talk. Switching from negative to positive self-talk is unlikely to happen overnight. Less negative / critical thinking can also help pave the way to a more positive sense of self over time. When you acknowledge your negative thoughts, let go of them. Negative self-talk can not only drain us physically, but also put us under psychological stress.
Examples of NEGATIVE SELF-TALK:
• “l can’t do anything right.”
• “I’m not good for anyone.”
• “I’m so dumb. How or why did i ever think I could accomplish something?”
• “this happened just because of me”
• “I know I’m a loser /failure “
• “My life is so bad “
Sometimes it’s best to not think at all than to listen to negative self talk. Catching yourself first is key to reframing daily. There is a famous saying by Karen R. Koenig –
Make sure you believe you deserve every Kind and encouraging Word you say to yourself.
Psychological Fact:
Self-Talk affects how you feel.
Events Thoughts = Emotions and Feelings
If you want to change how you feel, you must learn how to change how you think.
F-A-N (be cool):
A phenomenon called as F-A-N is primarily used to avoid a negative self-Talk
F = Freeze. Catch yourself in action. Pause and allow yourself the opportunity to address the thought.
A = Acknowledge and observe what you are saying to yourself and how it makes you feel.
N = Neglect the negative thoughts and change your thought by applying a positive coping skill or technique.
Stop blaming yourself for everything, try to divert your brain in different direction you cannot accurately tell your mind to stop thinking about something. That’s not how it works. When we try to tell our brain to stop thinking about something, it becomes even more difficult to get that thought out of our head. Instead of telling yourself that you don’t have a negative thought, you can distract your mind to focus on something more positive and specific. But before using these techniques, remember that it always takes time to develop new habits, do not expect results to always come immediately, sometimes people get tired of not getting immediate results and quit the practice early. Try to be patient, consistent, and kind to yourself.
Written by: Yumna Sethi
